There is something amiss here and it’s obvious. I write behind a closed door and pray that I’m not discovered. Who knows what his reaction will be to my simple need to emote into the abyss. All I know is that he is wary of every move that I make. Please let him fall asleep. Let me have an early night; relieve the pain.
I’ve got one week and 15% left to pack; I am panicked and crippled. I’ve nobody to confide in because I live with somebody who is a mirage. My body has betrayed me. My mind plays games that are filled with anxiety ALONE.
How did I get here? How is it that the only help that I can get I must pay for because my world is filled with vampires? What a moron!
An embarrassment, disappointment and a fool. I look at “the family” with contempt but am forbidden from saying one word. When did I become the women who only does as told – the shadow – broken and empty? No longer real and true – simply a shell – say nothing and all remains sane.
Who’s sanity are we discussing at this juncture.
Does sanity even exist any longer?