Once upon a time I believed in forever, miracles and pure joy.
I would hide in my walled off room, pink canopy bed; and devour books. Each night dreaming of a future far from the evil Queen.
Each evening the King, would ride into the village simply to put the stars in the sky just for me. It would fill my heart and allow me another night of sleep.
As I grew (and grew) displeasure expressed, I would go into the Kingdom late at night and take sweets to fill the expanding emptiness in my heart.
The King showed displeasure in this behavior, disappointed in my girth. Still he put the moon and the stars in place for me each night; and reminded me that I was his Princess and that he would love me forever.
As time passed the kingdom changed. Dragons appeared and the King was not always around to slay them. I was forced to learn how to defend myself. A good skill for a lone Princess but a sad one at best.
Who would love a Ptincess who had to slay her own dragons? Who had no sibling Ptincesses to teach her how to prance around properly on horseback. Or brother Princes, to introduce her to their friends to court her despite any change in appearance.
Princess developed a wonderful fantasy life, she wrote stories which never fell on another pair of eyes.
Over time the Queen because more relentless each time the King would leave the Kingdom. She had finally given birth to a Prince! It was HER child and she allowed the Princess or the King near him. Unlike the King who could ride off whenever he chose, the Princess was left in a castle filled with fire and ice.
Her stories became dark; they changed from tales into poems where the narrator would plead for help or freedom. Still her work was left unread, to show the King might upset him and that would break her heart.
Each time the King would return from his journeys he would shower the Princess with love and attention. It was these moments of bliss that kept the Princess alive and safe from the Queen.
Once I was “of age”, I was release from the castle and sent out into the world to make a life of my own. As no Prince had come to claim me, it was apparent that I was again, to slay my own dragons.
The world outside of the castle was far different than I had imagined, read in books or that my father had told me. In fact, there was little resemblance between the two. My dreams of being a writer and wearing long dresses that jingled when I walked were ubsurd. There was no place in the real world for poets and dreamers; it was too fast-paced and money was far more important than creativity.
I looked to my father, the King, he had acquired his fortune working in the world of money. As I had refused his earlier offers to enter into his business; he thought it best that I attempt it “on my own – just as he did”. He groomed me as his prodigy right down to the struggle.
Stubborn and desperate to please him, I worked tirelessly, a Princess in a King’s world. Luckily I was a pedigree; I knew exactly what to do and say to get ahead and please the Kings. I learned quickly. I inherited my father’s intelligence, mixed with my own ability to write and moved up further than he or I had imagined. All of this was to please him – granted, there were days when I reveled in the power – but still my heart heard the jingling of my poet’s skirt.
Fifteen years of my life I devoted to this industry, climbing and achieving – watching as the King beamed with pride. His joy transferred into mine, I was the least likely Princess to become successful in the world of Kings and money.
Time, as the cliche says, is a thief.
My father had left the evil Queen under a sourcer’s spell. She was far more devilish than the evil Queen. She could change her form from a dove to a dragon right before your very eyes. My father was blinded by her spell and I was too fearful of angering him that I never exposed his new more evil Queen.
It was her goal to kill the King and steal all of his riches. She was as slow and cunning as a snake – moving carefully towards her prey: my father.
Then she struck! It was devestating! I was blinded and although I had slated enormous dragons, I had never seen a monster as cruel or large as her – she eclipsed all that was good and light.
It took seven agonizing months for the evil serpent Queen to finish her task, but on a beautiful spring morning she murdered the King. My father was gone forever and with him, my heart broke wide open – never to be repaired.
Five years have passed and there is no “happily ever after”.
The Princess is still married to the soft but kind Prince from a family in another Kingdom.
The Princess never had any children of her own, chiding two sweet dogs – one of which is in the heavens with her father already.
I am the lonliest girl-woman, broken and alone in a room filled with people. Silently screaming, eternally panicked and unable to return to her previous life before I lost my father.
There is writing but only into an abyss of strangers eyes. The days of slaying dragons are long gone, now simple tasks leave me crippled. The strength is now in the stars and I am weak.
This is my fairytale
All that is left is my sweet ailing love of a hound, my soft Prince and me: the Princess that used to be.